Don’t bother to start your own business unless you like to smile.
They say it’s a tiny hole that sinks a ship. Don’t ignore smiles, corporate culture has not changed. All you have to remember is ‘when you smile, the whole world smiles with you.’ If you are stuck in a hole and you want to get out, what do you do? You smile.
Matt Bird in his excellent book, “Relationology,” he noted:
‘There are few things more important in our communication than smile. Our smile says a lot about us and what we think of ourselves and the people we are with. A genuine smile says that we are happy, fulfilled and contented people. It says, I am delighted to be with you. A smile is a universal icebreaker and the best scene setter for a conversation.’
“Successful people don’t make demands of others but set the scene so that the human in others can respond, rather than their chimp,” according to the book ‘The Chimp Paradox.’
Smile shows you are caring and it opens doors of friendship and acceptance. Smiling is an inborn spontaneous reaction which all humans have in common. Many confuse it to an act of pleasing. We have fake ones. Ones that are so short-lived like a flash. One that actually do not come from inside. One devoid of eye contact. One that tells you, ‘I care less.’ One that says, ‘you are not welcomed.’ In business, we have goal and people, what makes a difference is our thought. Striking a balance between these factors is the difference between success and failure. The most important ingredients in the formula of success is how we go along with people. They say, ‘business is not difficult but people make it difficult.’
When you smile at a person their brain coaxes to return a favour. I haven’t stop pondering when many don’t understand this. I went to an award event, one of the most prestigious ones to celebrate an important milestone. I like award ceremonies because favour and praises always flow like air to implement the law of increase. On arrival, as usual I moved to reception desk to meet the ushers who were flashing their smiles and were ready to help. Theirs were not fake or pushy, really likeable faces. There is nothing more than making a customer to believe that they are really liked and cared for.
Having exchanged a few jokes with the ushers, I proceeded into the hallway. I met the organiser who invited me. In that ecstatic mood, I flashed my smiles to jump start our passion for the day. I got the shocker of my life, the organiser gave me a lethal overdose of potassium, that triggered a kind of cardiac arrest that would make the best trained surgeon a child. He looked at me from head to toe, front and back that you are not welcomed. I have asked myself this same question many time:”why do many work against their best interest?” I was taken aback by the organiser’s attitude because I could not see anything wrong with one welcoming their guest. Why would one put up a straight face and stony mask? I did not want to fall prey to this at all!
A little smile on one side of the cheek and a little one on the other side was all I wanted.
I know smiles at times do not represent reality but the impression you give to your client or the guest is that you are hard on yourself and you don’t care about them. This is being cynical at best and at worst demonstrated ineptitude; one can not absolve themselves of lacking in such experiential knowledge. It is one of the most useful tools in promotion of human relationships. Such knowledge gets one into the game.The way one relates to people is about them. A friend once said: “If I meet someone for the first time they are quiet and seem to be disinterested in the conversation, I may see them as ridiculous, rude and might not want to meet them again.”
This is what a lot people will do. Don’t forget that people choose who they do business with based on attitude. The more one likes someone they more they are inclined to buy from them. One might have the best products and services yet buyers bypass them because they have no respect for one. I think most of what we do start from childhood when we develop one of these attitudes according to John Gray in his book,’How To Get What You Want,’ “I have needs and I have the power to get them met,” or “ I have needs and I am powerless to get them met.” We move through life feeling either powerless or powerful.
Bearing long faces around people shows how miserable and powerless one can be. Imagine having emerged from safe cocoon where one was surrounded with cheerful and warm people only to be assaulted in such unfriendly environment.
We all have expectations. If one has business and it is open to the public, know they have to respect people who they come in contact with. The kind of attitude one puts up says much about them. We have to learn to put ourselves in another person’s shoes and desist from seeing the world only from your own perspective. Interpersonal relationship is vital in business. Putting a stony face or long face leaves the door wide open. Sometimes a simply smiles can solve a huge problem.
Looking at the other side of the coin, It is wrong to make assumptions and judgement about a person without knowing the full facts and taking time to analyse the situation in the light of the truth. It might be that the organiser was going through difficult time and could not possibly concentrate as to really respond with a smile or have an eye contact. One has to understand that people live in their own world and most often than not they have unpleasant situation around them and that could affect them.
Finding out about their circumstance or accepting that there may be influences around them which you and I are not aware of, can go in a long way stopping people from judging others with prejudice or making preconceived expectation and assumptions. Above all compliments work wonders in businesses, so shine your smiles!